It's funny how God will speak through pretty much anything. I watched a Disney movie tonight called "Meet the Robinsons". The main character, Lewis, is a braniac orphan who wants nothing more than a family, but he is rejected by over a hundred potential parents. Lewis decides that his real mom is the only one who ever wanted him, so he invents a memory scanner to try and find her. All his endeavors of looking in the past fail, and it's only when his son comes out of the future to help save him from the wicked antagonist that Lewis realizes that it's better to "keep moving forward", live who you are in the moment, and trust that things will turn out all right in the end.
I've said over and over again for several years that I was born in the wrong century on the wrong continent. Ever since I was a preteen, my heart has gotten fired up over stories about Narnia, Middle Earth, Robin Hood, Merlin, and Pocahontas. I would watch that one scene from "Beauty and the Beast" over and over again, where Belle runs out to the field and sings: "I want adventure in the great wide somewhere! I want it more than I can tell." To say that I've never opened my closet with my eyes closed, hoping beyond hope that I would find a land of fauns, centaurs, kings, and great battles on the other side would be a lie. I was born for something more than this! The problem is, in all my years of reading fantasy novels and watching epic films, I've allowed the "something more" to be set in a scene that will never be. I will never fight with a sword, or ride a horse over leagues of hillside to warn a neighboring country of invasion, or live in a great castle at the side of a handsome prince. Capes and crowns, swords and shields are only a thing of the imagination (unless you attend a Renaissance Festival, of course). So the hunger for adventure rises within me, only to fade into a brooding melancholy as the sensible part of me whispers, "it can never be."
But today, as I looked into the DVD cabinet, trying to pick something to watch, my eyes passed over "Gladiator", "The Matrix", "Indiana Jones", and "Star Wars". For a moment, I settled on one of my all-time favorites: "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe". I look at that cover, and instantly I feel the warrior within me rise up, anxiously waiting for a two-hour release into a world where I feel I would fit in so easily. But tonight, I didn't want it. I didn't want the let down at the end, where Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy all go back through the wardrobe, I turn the TV off, and I'm right back in my own "humdrum" world again. I want more, and I can't have Narnia; Aslan isn't here for me to see. So instead, I pick a cute movie that I've seen before and knew would give me a few laughs, but yet keep me vaguely in the present.
Sunday at church, the speaker talked about Ephesians 2:8-10; how we are God's workmanship, and how that word "workmanship" in the Greek implies a Masterpiece, not a bench. God has created an adventure for me, and it's an exciting treasure hunt of an adventure. A good story has danger, mystery, romance, trials, purpose, interesting characters, and always, always a good ending. My life is a story that God is writing, and Jesus danced like a wild man when they first came up with the plot line! It has always been difficult to view my life as an adventure story. 20th century, normal life, ok jobs that pay enough to get me by if I spend wisely (still learning), rent, bills, occasional hang outs with friends, normal family stuff (aka: mildly dysfunctional but no more than the normal American family). I mean, what kind of setting is that for a great adventure? For a year I broke away from it and lived in England (Lord, take me back!), no work, no money, living in a house overflowing with people, serving Jesus and the city I lived in, crazy adventures like getting stranded in London the day after Christmas...now that is what an adventure should look like!
But is it the adventure I'm called to?
If Lewis had stayed at the orphanage, continuing to think that there was no one else in the world that wanted him except his mom and did not go ahead with his dreams of inventing, he never would have met his loving adoptive parents, who would give him room to be himself and become one of the greatest inventors the future would ever see. Everyone kept telling Lewis, "Keep moving forward!" "Congratulations! You make a mistake! Now you can learn from it; just keep moving forward!" Eventually, Lewis got it, and when given the ability to find his mom, he gave it up, because he knew that his future was exactly what he wanted. And he would get it.....if he kept moving forward.
When I sit, contemplating a really good book set in medieval times, with chivalry, honour, courage, nobility, and romance (yes, I'm a woman, so sue me), and I wish that I was there, in that time period and setting, I'm stranding myself in the past. And mine is worse: at least Lewis was focused on something that actually happened in his lifetime! But God gently reminded me that I need to keep moving forward. His future for me is such an amazing adventure story that I can't even imagine how great it will be! All it takes is TRUST! Trust that He is who He says He is. Trust that He is the omniscient Maker, and that He created me to fit my story, and my story to fit me, and for both to give Him the glory and honour and praise. Unstick yourself, Sara Beth! While it is hard to lay down these heart dreams, they must be uprooted to make way for something so much more grander and magnificent than could be imagined by human thought! I will trust You, Lord, and take a step forward with You. Grant me grace, courage, and patience to walk only where You lead, neither looking to the right nor the left toward the other adventures that may beckon to my pride but are not mine to pursue. My life is Yours, lead me as You will.
